Now, I hear some moms saying "Oh KC.. I swore I would never buy a minivan! "Oh KC.. get an SUV! They have just as much room!" "OH KC Minivans are not cool!".. Right. I hear you. But let me tell you something.. When you become a parent, you do a lot of UNCOOL stuff.. Like wiping Butts. Is that cool? No. No its not. Is lifting your kid up to smell their butt to see if they pooped cool? NOPE. Its not. Is saying out loud "Please don't eat the dog food" cool? No.. so for all of you that still think you are 'cool'.. This is going to be heartbreaking for you to hear.. but Alas. You are not.
Once you enter the realm of parenting, "COOL" goes out the Window.. Now hey, you might regain some cool points later, but you will never be full on cool again. You know why? Because your kids wont' let you.. and even if you are kickin it, thinking you are cool.. Most likely your kids do not think you are. Cross said to me this morning "Daddy is more funny than you".. so see.. there's that.
So. Don't judge my mini van. Her name is Dolly.
Speaking of things that aren't cool.. The Girls are still not Potty trained. And.. not only are they NOT potty trained, they really show no signs of ever wanting to BE potty trained. I remember, before I was a mom (You know, when I was cool) I thought.. Oh, if I have kids, we will save so much money by quitting diapers at 18 months. HAHAHAHAA! Jokes on me. Yup. Dangit. Cross is the closest of the two.. She will wake up in the morning, tell me she is going to wear her big girl Panties.. Tell me that she is going to Poop in the potty.. And then, by the time I've driven to work.. Poops her pants. So yay. Parenting Win. As for Londyn.. Yeah, Good luck.
Everyone has given me so much 'advice' that I'm ready to trach Chop them.. "It has to be her idea! She's still so young! You can't make her! No one goes to Kindergarten Pooping their pants! Hmm.. Well.. when I look at my VERY Unique children.. this last one doesn't do much for me.. I mean I have children that think Bloody Clowns are their besties, and sing Disturb's Sound of Silence, followed by It is well with my soul. So yeah, I certainly get that they are not 'the norm'.. So then I think.. Well.. Maybe I do have the only children that ARE going to go to Kindergarten Pooping their pants.. Add more cool points to me! I mean.. look at them..
The Good news is.. I really don't care that much about being cool anymore. I feel like with my 13 years on the radio.. I did REALLY cool stuff a lot of the time.. So now its time for a bit of lame-ness. And I'm pretty Ok with that. Because.. right now, The girls still do think I'm cool.. I'm sure there will come a time (in the near future) when they don't.. But right now I literally make magic happen by cracking an egg, and Showing them how to make Rice Krispy Treats.. So I'll take it while I can!
PS, My Minivan Doors Open with a press of a button. I have a sweet Sound System and Blue Tooth.. What more could I want!