There are just some things..

A couple of days ago, on my lunch hour.. I ran to Target to get Cille some Bananas and a few other things.. and as I was walking in.. A Very pregnant woman was pushing a (maybe) 1 year old baby into the store.. Singing loudly.. "The Baby Hippo sings and dances" in an ooshy gooshy baby voice. It was at that moment.. (or probably way before) that I realized there are some types of Mom that I am never going to be..

This used to upset me.. and to be honest, it still does sometimes. I am NOT like everyone else. I never have been. I'm not sure why, but I've always been a little different. I can remember as young as 3 or 4 playing by myself and putting on Concerts.. I was a very driven child. I thought I could change the world at a very early age by stirring a giant stick in the sand, and calling on "The Power of God".. (don't ask my mom about this.. she still finds it creepy).. Its never bothered me that I was an only child.. or that I played by myself a lot, because my imagination was insane. I mean the things I could come up with were bizarre.

Mom and I were discussing this yesterday.. Because we see inklings of this in Cross and it scares us, lol.. When Mom was watching the girls last weekend she let them watch a fish cartoon.. Well apparently the baby fish got taken away from their mom (temporarily) and Cross began to cry and cry.. Mom eventually had to just change the channel and tell her the fish was re-united.. She takes things like that HARD. I used to cry when My dad would spank my stuffed animals.. Now, if he spanked me, It wasn't that terrible.. but if he spanked my bunny, I would cry and cry.. I've always had a soft spot for stuffed animals. Still do.. and sadly I think this has spilled out onto Cross, because she is so tender to everyone of her babies..

So anyway, I've always been different. I didn't do things the "norm" did.. I didn't really know if I was ever going to get married, and I honestly didn't care. I was always busy with radio and school and teaching and volunteering and the other 245 things I liked to do, that I didn't feel "incomplete" because I wasn't married.. I also didn't see the point in marrying someone that you were going to want to divorce in 5 years.. I don't feel like I had a good handle on God's view of marriage until I met MJ. I don't even know if we had a good view of it when we got married, but I feel like learning God's expectations of marriage has sure helped ours.. and Continues to teach us things daily. I also truly believe that God built MJ just for me. He fills the voids where I can't, completes what I am missing, and understands how my heart works. I'm certainly glad I waited for him.

I didn't know if I would ever have kids.. I also didn't care too much about that. MJ and I were really happy in our lives at the time we decided to give it to to God. If he wanted us to have kids, we would and we would see what happened.. Man. God is funny isn't he? Twins? Wow. OK God, that was funny.. As blessed as I am now to have my two goats.. We decided at that moment when we gave it to God, that if we didn't have kids.. that would be ok too. We weren't going to go to great measures to make it happen.. we were going to be happy with that decision.. But as you can see, God is funny, and gave me 2 at a time.. ha ha! I wouldn't have it any other way..

But I've realized as I have gotten married, and had kids.. that I don't always do things like everyone else..and that is ok, But sometimes I let it get the best of me.. When I see other mom's writing all these amazing things that their kids do, and mine has just kicked me in the face.. Or how excited they are to stay home all day everyday with their kids.. and I'm thinking "I gotta get out of this house pretty quick or my head my fall off".. Or When a kid is having a full on temper tantrum, and I'm thinking.. man, I would beat their ... ... .... And the patient mom has a relaxes look on her face, not even concerned about it.. It baffles me. Partly because it seems unrealistic to me, and partly because I ENVY that.. Like I wish I was that patient, and showed that much grace all the time!! But I've realized neither one of those things is bad or good.. Its just different. Its a different way to go about life.. Not everyone does things the same way, and there is beauty, and freedom in that.

There is a lot of Mom-shaming in the world today.. People touting one way of doing things as 'better' and 'healthier' for your kid.. "Don't give them medicine! Vaccines are bad! Make sure you Vaccinate! Don't feed Formula! Breastfeeding is embarrassing! Don't let them eat Pizza! Only Put Essential Oils on them! Don't let them listen to music! Enroll them in private School!  Don't let them on IPADS! Don't let them watch TV! Get them in Gymnastics! Why aren't they playing Soccer! Public School teaches them Life!! Why don't you let them stay home, they are only little once!"

I mean its really never ending.. And the point is.. Everyone's going to do it differently.. and that is Perfectly Awesome. What works for one, doesn't always work for another.. And what makes one smile, can make another one frown. The best way we can be good to our kids is by being good to our God.. being good spouses.. and being good to ourselves. So whatever that is for YOU.. Be ok with it. I struggle with it everyday.. but I'm happy to have always danced to the beat of my own song.. Usually a song I made up.. and sang to my stuffed animals, or my Grandparents out front on the lawn..So there's that.

The Wonderful World of Thomas..

So my girls are not usually 'into' what every other kid in the world is into it seems.. Like the whole "Frozen" thing.. I have put it on several times.. They just don't care about it. I feel like they are a choice few who are not.. but I can honestly say I'm not sad that I don't have to hear "Let it go" 235 times a day..

My girls have always liked.. 1) Daniel Tiger, 2) Bubble Guppies, 3) Sofia the 1st. out of those, they really like Bubble guppies the best. But.. Recently they started loving trains. The Church library has a train table and they love playing with it every Wednesday when we are there.. The Church was a lot smarter about their train table.. They SCREWED IN the tracks.. SMART. SMART.. Why you say? Because our train track looks like a sad mess. No tracks together.. no buildings standing up.. Just sad. In my defense, I tried to glue it.. but they magically tore up the glue.. So.. I'm either going to have to get out the hammer or screws soon for our train table..

Anyway I digress.. Because they have started liking trains.. the only Real "train" toys.. is Thomas the train. Now.. I have seen Thomas a few times.. but when I found the show on TV I have to admit... Thomas The Train is Creepy. Its a Creepy Show.. They have these trains that ride around on Tracks with giant faces on the front of them.

The Crane that puts stuff onto the trailers of the Trains is named "Cranky".. I mean that does not sound fair. Would you want to be named "Cranky".. I feel like it auto puts the Crane guy in a bad mood.. But they are all a little weird. The animated one is better than the older one that looks like stick people and clay trains.. but the faces are odd.. of course the girls now love this, so I'm resigned to watching Thomas.. and James.. and Spencer.. and Cranky Apparent. Welcome to Toddler Life. 

So the girls went to Western OK last weekend.. They are talking NON stop now, both of them.. and they love to face-time with their grandparents.. Although every-time Gigi Calls to talk to Cille, Cille says "Gigi, where's Pa?".. Mom came and got them last Friday and they had a big time. They went to Pops and Grammy's on Saturday to play with Ava.. They always have a good time when they go to the farm.. but now they never want to come back.. Which sometimes makes me sad.. because I have to convince them to come home with me.. But when you think about it, why would any kid want to come home from their grandparents house? Here's what they get to do at the Grandparents house:

1) Cross drinks Coffee With Gigi every morning

2) Cille wears her PJ's as a Superhero Cape

3) Cross takes off her clothes, gets under a soft blanket, and then has Gigi give her back rubs. 

4) They both eat Maraschino cherries out of a Jar. 

5) At Pops & Grammy's they drink Sweet Tea and Limeade

6) They eat whatever they want at all hours of the day

7) They go to bed whenever they want to

8) They Get up whenever they want to

9) They have someone to push them on the swing for like 24 hours straight

10) They play in the hay, feed cows, and feed their Donkey Kris

11) Pops and Grammy have a room that is filled to the brim with toys.. that they get to go in, destroy, and not even pick up after themselves! 

So yeah.. after I read over that.. I would also only want to stay at my grandparents house! I always wanted to stay with my grandma Leona. She kept me while my parents were at work when I was little.. and when I think back about why I loved being with her so much.. its because she made my time with her ALL ABOUT ME. I remember sitting in the floor and us playing marbles.. Eating Cherry pie filling right out of the can.. Building forts in the middle of the living room with sheets and cushion.. Going to the TG&Y and getting to pick out a new stuffed animal to take home (EVERY TIME WE WENT TO THE STORE)..We would play Old Maid.. or Hide & Seek.. It was like every moment I was at her house, Her own world stopped because she was only there to be with me. 

I'd imagine that is what every kid wants. Just to have someone want to spend time with them. I think with me having twins its sometimes hard to just let time stand still and just "BE" with them.. I'm always trying to cook supper.. or get them ready for church.. Or Rush around to this or that.. But all they really want me to do is just sit down and be WITH them.                                                                                                                                                                             This morning before I left for Work, much like every morning.. Cross wants "Mommy, sit by you".. that is all she wants. Me to just sit with her in whatever she is doing. Watching TV, Playing, whatever it is.. she just wants me to be present with her, because that is what is most important to her.. And I think that is why grandparents are so awesome.. For that weekend, or that day, or those hours they have them.. its all about The girls, and they love it. Parents have so much responsibility that we rush around and don't always get to enjoy the moments with them, but Grandparents just sit and wait for you to bring them over so they can soak up every drop of their childlike sweetness. That is Awesome, and something I'm so grateful for those moments. 

On our weekend of Freedom, MJ & I went out to dinner with Friends, and over to visit my brother Randy's new Baby, Harper.. I didn't hold her.. Because I barely wanted to hold my own babies.. so I just admired her from afar, lol.. Having my own babies didn't make me any less scared of other babies.. so there's that. 

I think our favorite thing about "No kid weekend" is sleeping past 5:30am. We both go to work early, and the girls have always Woke up early.. so getting to sleep till 7 is magic.. 

The Michael Jackson Party Planning is in full swing. I have to say, I think I probably get more excited about it than the girls.. They stop whatever they are doing if Michael comes on and immediately start dancing around the room. Here's some ridiculous things the girls have been doing lately.. Cille now knows all the words to "Joy Joy Joy" and sings it into her Karaoke Mic.. Cross still likes to sing "Santa Claus is coming to town" and "Sittin on the Dock of the Bay"

Cross gets upset anytime someone gets onto her, or onto Cille and she will say "Hey, quit being mean to me".. Not realizing that dicipline is probably going to be considered 'mean' for the rest of her life. She also points a crooked finger at you while saying this. They have started being sweet to each other a little.. and giving each other hugs. Cross will say "HI _____ I've missed you!" and then give you a hug. They both now say "TRUST ME" because Leslie says that to them.. so they will look at you and say "TRUST ME".. 

They love the new swingset. LOVE it. We got it from someone in our neighborhood who was moving. We have no idea if we got it at a good price or not, We paid $575 for it.. but.. We didn't have to put it together, so that was worth that alone! Plus Kenny at All Star Moving and Storage Moved it for us and put it back together.. So if you ever have things like that you need done, or furniture moved in your house, call All Star Moving.. 405-399-3004 Love those guys! 

The only other thing I have to tell you about, is a new Page I joined on Facebook where you can buy ridiculously Cute outfits for a fraction of the boutique prices you would pay elsewhere.. Its called "Spades Boutique".. Just hit "Join" and you can get in on the deals as well!... you're Welcome.